They say that there is no formula when it comes to falling in and out of love. It just happens, sometimes even before your brain realizes what your heart has already been going through for months. When new love begins, it’s always uniquely beautiful and full of butterflies and awkward first dates that lead to less-awkward second dates and first kisses. That may be true, but I have to slightly disagree on the falling out of love part.
Because every heartbreak story almost always has the same fucked-up twist.
I’ve seen it too many times before: The inevitable doom that almost every relationship is headed towards. One person slipping further away while the other one holds on ever tighter. The misunderstanding that ensues and the consequent blames thrown toward each other, ironically disregarding the i-love-you-no-matter-what promises both made only months before.
The thing is that promises lead to expectations; expectations eventually lead to disappointments; disappointments lead to misery; misery leads to exaggerated blames, until finally, these blames lead up to heartbreak and never speaking to each other again.
These are the constants, with the possible participation of a few variables a.k.a third parties, drunken confessions, and morning-after regrets. Mix them all together and you get your old-fashioned, swollen-eyed, wine-soaked, chocolate-munching brokenhearted soul. There’s your formula. There’s the science of heartbreak.
But, I will tell you this. With everything considered, despite the detailed and gut-wrenching truths that entail long-term relationships, regardless of the number of wine bottles that will potentially be consumed, of pounds that might be gained, and of likely drunk-dialing embarrassments that must be endured—you are the wonderful silver lining.
You and your adorable little quirks that set you apart from an entire population of people wanting to be like you. You may be the impending cause for butterflies, and the welcome initiator of the First Date, however awkward it may be (and it will be). As much as it scares me to admit it, you are the only possibility of canceling out every constant and variable in the formula for heartbreak.